Saturday, April 11, 2009


I got arrested yesterday. I've never been arrested before. It was interesting. The process was definitely reminiscent of military procedure, right down to the random arrogant pricks that stand out, just screaming 'I hate myself, so you will hate me too'. Funny thing was that the most heinous of the bunch I was witness to, were the females. I'm sure there's reasons why you get put into booking and not housing. I ended up spending more than 7 hours in the holding area, not too bad of a place to be. Overripe apples and underripe oranges were provided along with sandwiches, I stuck to the fruit, in an effort to avoid any prepared food. I was allowed access to my cell phone one time, I only retrieved one number, Moms. After finding out that calls to a different area code weren't allowed, I called a Bond company. The seedy crook wanted 15% of the bail, I agreed to my first case of rape and they took my credit card number. I called back sometime around 3, to my delight the agent was irritated, my bail had already been posted. I graciously apologized. Okay, bail is posted, time to get out. No, why not, because the head prick has the paperwork on his desk for releases and has decided to let them marinate on his desk. Four and a half hours passed before my family showed up to jail and started asking questions. Within 15 minutes of them showing up, I was out. But when I asked about it on the inside, both times I was told that there was a lot of paperwork and other releases and so on so goes forth the bullshit. Oh yah, what did I get arrested for? I took my Mtn. bike from my marital residence by means of a rope over the fence. Expensive Mtn. Bike outside the garage + Estranged wife + Restraining order + Retrieval of bike = Jail

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